4 things i’ve stopped telling myself // Working towards a healthy, happier mind

When 2018 rolled around, which let’s be honest was quite a while ago now as we’ve suddenly woken up and it’s April?! I thought about the negative thoughts that I believe had been holding me back as I navigated life as a young woman going through college, university, career beginnings and life.

Before the end of last year, I made a point to write these thoughts down and study them in more depth to see how I could alter my thinking. Today i’m sharing these thoughts with you as they might help you to take stock and make a change about how you think about things. After-all, we’re all striving for a healthy and happy mind.

1. “I’m just too busy…”

For me, it does often feel like there are simply not enough hours in the day to achieve everything on my to-do list. I am a master of organisation, prioritising and getting shit done, but there are a few things that perhaps i’m selectively saying that i’m too busy for. The main thing being, exercise. At the end of a long day at work followed by a traffic-laden commute, i’m hungry, drained and just want to flop on the sofa and watch telly.

The very last thing I want to do is work out. I don’t think it helps that my boyfriend lives by the mantra of always been ‘too busy’ as he builds and grows his business. We’re a household of busy bee’s. However, I’m now actively trying to plan my days to ensure I can slot in exercise and the time to cook a meal from scratch. It’s not easy, but these days when it’s fashionable to be seen to say you’re ‘soooo busy’ – it’s also okay to not be busy and make time for meaningful headspace to recalibrate yourself. You can’t burn the candle at both ends!

2. “There’s no point, it won’t make a difference anyway…”

Guilty as charged with this one. I often struggle to see how my mere contribution can make a difference to the bigger picture. I remember one of my hardest struggles was to crack the back of my maths GCSE. Sure, I mastered it eventually after many, many, many hours of hard work, but at the time, my go to line would be: ‘There’s no point in doing these extra tuition lessons because it won’t make a difference anyway, I still won’t get that C” – What I needed to be telling myself was, after all this hard graft, i’m sure to see some improvement in my grade, no matter how small! And even if I didn’t, I can add tenacity and sheer perseverance to my list of traits. It’s better to try instead of counting myself out as a failure before i’ve even started.

3. “No, I can’t do that because i’m too thick…”

In a similar vein to the point above, i’ve always had low self confidence when it comes to my ability. Anyone who knows me will tell you that. I would always shy away from going forward for opportunities in fear of being ‘too thick’ – I now understand that i’ll never be good at maths, winged eyeliner, crosswords or dealing with lots of complicated data but that’s alright because i’m kick ass at other things that are probably more important to my day to day functioning.

4. “I don’t care…”

This is something I say to protect myself, It’s easier for me to say: “I don’t care” than to accept what may be happening. One thing to know about me, I bloody do care. I care about far too much about everything and anything and it drives me potty sometimes. I think it’s really important to pick and choose what you do actually give your time to care about. I’ve dwelled on things so much in the past and what i’ve dwelled upon has never even happened. Let it go! Your mind will be clearer for it!

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