Tuesday, 29 November 2016

NOTES: 12 THINGS I'VE LEARNED UPON TURNING 23



(I've ALWAYS been a red lipstick lover)

Today rather excitingly marks my 23rd birthday and I thought that for today's blog post I would share with you 12 pieces of wisdom i've learned and things i've observed so far in my 23 years here on planet Earth.

1. Nobody has a clue what they're doing, whether they're 3, 23, 53 or 103...
We are all just pretty much muddling through life trying to stick to a vague plan and hoping for the best. When I was younger I figured that adult life meant you knew what you were doing all the time, how wrong could I be? In fact adult life is even more confusing to navigate...but the good thing is nobody has it completely sussed and that is okay.

2. Never miss an opportunity to say I love you...
The people you love most in life will die and you will realise how precious life is. I very sadly and of course inevitably lost two of my grandparents within a short space of time when I was 20 - I've never gotten over it, but life does go on and you will feel okay again. The last words I ever said to both of them were: "I love you" and that reminds me to say it as often as I can to my nearest and dearest.

3. Life changing opportunities appear, if you put in the legwork...
You have to get the ball rolling and by making a few changes to your daily routine you will start to adjust your bigger life picture. For example, when I was at university I was committed to working, finding internships, being proactive in building my CV and blogging which led me to meeting the founder of a digital marketing agency, 2 years after meeting him on the off chance he offered me an amazing job and the first step on the content marketing career ladder.

4. Life up until the age of 23 is like jumping fences...
So far my life has been an obstacle course overcome by jumping a series of fences. It started with boxing off my GCSE's in high school which led to starting college and completing my A levels, which led to going to university and finalising my degree, which led to getting started in my career. Often when you're a young adult there is a certain 'path' taken to get through each 'stage' - once you leave university and start working it is odd knowing that your life isn't dictated by the academic year and there are no more fixed obstacles to overcome, you have to set your own goals.

 5. The most interesting people you will meet in life have been tested the hardest...
The people who have really been through the ringer will always have the best lessons and advice to share. I once met a man who consistently had to fight for people to take him seriously as they always thought he was drunk and slurring his words...he wasn't he had just been in a horrific car accident which left him in a coma for months - his attitude to life was both moving and inspiring. If people have felt it, lived it and are still around to tell the tale...listen to them because they have legitimate wisdom.

6. Things are a little bit easier if you know what your passion is...
I have pretty much always known that I wanted to be a writer of some sort and I have found navigating my life a little easier as I was constantly pursuing a writing career. I studied the craft of journalism at university and I now write every single day whether that is at work or right here on my blog. When I was younger I loved coding, I loved creating and I loved writing, I feel blessed everyday to have a full time job that pulls together all of the above.



7. Don't try and be someone that you're not because you will just run into yourself...
A classic example of this is when I was 18 I bragged to my Dad how 'uni life' was going to be the best thing since sliced bread, I would party all night, party all day, be a total social butterfly and join every sports society. Who was I kidding? When I finally got to university I realised that the A-typical social side was not for me. My boyfriend at the time was the captain of a sports team, was out drinking all the time and I felt like an alien for not being the same. I preferred going for meals with 1 or 2 friends, and avoiding flat parties like the plague. University (the social side, not the academic side) was the most challenging period of my life and as soon as I stopped running away from who I really was, I was a happy little lamb. This meant not living in a shared house, I lived in my own flat, keeping a small but close social circle and doing things that I actually wanted to do, not what the social norms made me think I should do.

8. There are good times and there are bad times, but this too shall pass...
Sometimes it feels like there is no way out of a dark place no matter how hard you try and you feel like you're never going to feel okay again. But these times don't stick around. You may also feel on top of the world, like nothing can bring you down and life is sweet as a peach. But these times don't stick around either. Appreciate the good and work through the bad.

9. When it comes to matters of heart, you will always be okay...
Heartbreak absolutely sucks and it is one of the worst feelings in the world, the feeling of rejection, of not being good enough, the humiliation if infidelity is involved, BUT you will get over it and someone else will come along and show you exactly why it didn't work out before. A work colleague of mine always said to me that: 'it gets better everytime' and it's true, each relationship is better than the last because you know what you are looking for and what you are and aren't prepared to accept.

10. People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime...
Everybody who enters into your life all have a meaning. They are either there for a reason, perhaps to show you a new way of thinking, a season perhaps whilst you are travelling or on an experience together such as an internship programme, or a lifetime to always be there for you no matter what. It is important to respect all of these people and the time frame that they are in your life for.

11. You will click with some people and you won't with others...
I love something Dita Von Teese once said: 'You could be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, but there's always someone who doesn't like peaches.' - This is true, there are some people who have done no wrong to you, but you just cannot click with them, and that's fine, respect the people that you do and do not click with, it's just the way life is sometimes. I have met countless people in my life that I had hoped to get along with but unfortunately we couldn't click, it made me even more dedicated to nurturing the relationships with the people I do gel with.

12. Complete strangers will surprise you...
I met my close friend Lauren when as complete strangers she saw a tweet i'd written about having no friends when I had moved to Liverpool for university and how incredibly lonely I felt. Lauren reached out to me and asked if I fancied meeting up for a coffee, we met up and I cried for around 2 hours straight, I could not believe that somebody I had never spoken to before in my life would go out of their way and want to meet up to help a stranger feel less homesick and unhappy. 4 years later I still live in Liverpool and Lauren and I are still the best of mates. It just goes to show there are good people out there, strive to be one of them.

And with that i'm off for a cocktail or three to celebrating 23 years of sassiness...Remember to always work hard, screw social norms and try to always be the best version of yourself.


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